Well, this week I have been getting a bit of a hard time from my family. They have called it "the week of Michael", as if that is a bad thing :). All because each day for the past week I have asked Michael what it is that he would want to do before he started kindergarten. The list has been varied. Play checkers, go to the pool, make chocolate chip cookie pie . . . it has been a good week. All leading up to tomorrow, the start of kindergarten.
So here on the eve of beginning life as a school mom I am full of insecurity, excitement, hope, worry . . . name the emotion it is in me NOW!! Where has the time gone? How can he be 5?
We have been talking a lot about what to expect, how to act, but even though he feels excited and full of anticipation, I have evidently not been listening to my own pep talks. I'm thinking about how much I will miss of his life. I'm wondering if I have done the mom thing well enough to send him off well into a whole new life. So tonight when he told me that I didn't need him to walk him into the school tomorrow, I was both sad and happy. Happy that he feels so ready, but sad that so quickly he is independent and doesn't need me. We did decide that I would walk him in tomorrow and leave right away and then we would see how Tuesday would go. Good plan right? We talked about hugs and kisses before, not at the school.
I know that what I told him is true. This is an important step on his journey to who God wants him to be. This is where we begin to figure out what God has planned for his life. This is just the beginning. Why is that so easy to say, know it is true, and yet is so hard to embrace. I could go on about why I am blue and what I have said to him, but really said to me, but I am going to stop myself . . . HERE!
Now the plan for tomorrow. Up in plenty of time to pray, get myself ready and then get my kindergartner going. For him, shower, pancakes, pray, into the van (I know I am close enough to walk, but I want to be in the privacy of my van for the crying, not walking down the sidewalk making a scene) hug and kiss, then walk to the classroom and leave him there excited and curious as to what the day will bring. I will then return to my van, cry for a bit, head to a mom date with great friends at Olde World for some commiserating (may cry a bit more - but hoping to keep the tears to a minimum, no guarantees) then off for a walk with Sally, her Maddy, and my Adah, return home make banana bread for an after school snack, then return to the school to pick up my boy. Hopefully he is still excited. Return home and hear all about his day over his favorite snack. Good plan right?
So glad we were able to take this last week to focus on the great things about summer and family. HOORAY for the week of Michael. I think it maybe become a tradition. Not always the week of Michael, Adah may not like that when it is her turn to go to school. Oh brother, not ready to deal with that yet, so forget I said that.
The exciting thing about Michael going to school is that Adah and I will get to be together all day, just us girls. Some solid time to learn all about the daughter God blessed me with. I love the prospect of that!! We haven't had much time just us girls, so this is an awesome opportunity to figure out some of those things that are easy to miss when there is more than one person competing for your attention. I think that she will miss Michael, but we will find our rhythm. Such a blessing hidden within a change and the sadness that change brings. But isn't that one of the things God does best?
Here is what I have been praying with Michael and a verse I love when things are unknown: Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Isn't that a great way to send your favorite boy to kindergarten?
Monday, August 23, 2010
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Baby Shower :)
Today at camp I was blessed to be able to attend a baby shower of a dear friend, Sarah. We go way back, she was in my cabin when I was a counselor here, many moons ago. Now she and her sweet hubby work at MY camp East Iowa Bible Camp with my sweet sister Sarah and her hubby. What a blessing all children are, but it seems like you acknowledge the miracle more when it is a long wished and prayed for child, like this little girl is. We can't wait to meet you and tell you stories of your parents enduring faith, hope, and love for the miracle of you. See you in September :)
So, today we had to give some mom advice to Sarah as she begins to embark on this life altering journey of enlarging her family. This activity has made me think a bit about some of my mom advice. So when I begin to reflect and have the time to actually do it, I sit down and do this, blog a bit.
1) Find a way to celebrate each child's person - both the stuff you love as well as the stuff that takes some adjusting to. Strengths are show even in bad behavior or just the stuff that you don't get that may drive you crazy.
2) Do something that lets the child know that they create joy in you - just by being themselves.
3) Realize that you get to grow with your child, and praise God that they aren't born with a long memory or the ability to tell all your beginner's mistakes. There is a learning curve. Enjoy the time of learning.
4) Begin to practice hard and uncomfortable conversations, before they can talk back. I started talking about what is private and who should be touching it with Michael as a baby, so I could get past my nerves and weirdness before he could ask me any questions or remember how I goofed it up.
5) Laugh a lot and remember whether you laugh or cry you still have to clean up the mess. The laughing makes it easier.
6) Find a way to say "I Love You" so that they hear it even when you don't say the words.
7) Enjoy this time. It is short, too short.
I hope that you will find the joy (there will still be rotten days, but as a whole) in motherhood that I have found and that I saw in my mom. I knew that she loved me and loved being my mom, because she said it or showed it nearly every day of my life. That is a power that is unmet by any superhero, TMZ character, politician, or power broker. It is the power of a God loving parent who can bless their child with the unconditional love they need to grow, fall, thrive, fail, and succeed. I pray that one day even after all my mess ups my kids will say, "Mom was many things, some good, some crazy, and some that I don't want to be, but she was a person with great love for me." Today I pray that will be your story as well.
God bless you Sarah and Tyson and your growing family. I pray for an uneventful birth and a healthy child and many years to hold your entire family close.
So, today we had to give some mom advice to Sarah as she begins to embark on this life altering journey of enlarging her family. This activity has made me think a bit about some of my mom advice. So when I begin to reflect and have the time to actually do it, I sit down and do this, blog a bit.
1) Find a way to celebrate each child's person - both the stuff you love as well as the stuff that takes some adjusting to. Strengths are show even in bad behavior or just the stuff that you don't get that may drive you crazy.
2) Do something that lets the child know that they create joy in you - just by being themselves.
3) Realize that you get to grow with your child, and praise God that they aren't born with a long memory or the ability to tell all your beginner's mistakes. There is a learning curve. Enjoy the time of learning.
4) Begin to practice hard and uncomfortable conversations, before they can talk back. I started talking about what is private and who should be touching it with Michael as a baby, so I could get past my nerves and weirdness before he could ask me any questions or remember how I goofed it up.
5) Laugh a lot and remember whether you laugh or cry you still have to clean up the mess. The laughing makes it easier.
6) Find a way to say "I Love You" so that they hear it even when you don't say the words.
7) Enjoy this time. It is short, too short.
I hope that you will find the joy (there will still be rotten days, but as a whole) in motherhood that I have found and that I saw in my mom. I knew that she loved me and loved being my mom, because she said it or showed it nearly every day of my life. That is a power that is unmet by any superhero, TMZ character, politician, or power broker. It is the power of a God loving parent who can bless their child with the unconditional love they need to grow, fall, thrive, fail, and succeed. I pray that one day even after all my mess ups my kids will say, "Mom was many things, some good, some crazy, and some that I don't want to be, but she was a person with great love for me." Today I pray that will be your story as well.
God bless you Sarah and Tyson and your growing family. I pray for an uneventful birth and a healthy child and many years to hold your entire family close.
Monday, July 12, 2010
Sorry Target Shoppers . . .
Today, I was hoping to run a few errands after the stop at the Dr. for some meds to fix the strep throat I caught from my son. We were just going to run into a couple places, quick, smooth, in my typical mother of the year fashion.
The fatal flaw in my day was daring to pee.
Yes, that evidently turns children into non-obeying, personal space crashing, annoying little rug rats that get everyone talking.
I told them on the way in, a quick stop in the bathroom for me and then into the fun double cart for some bargain hunting and maybe even checking for a Lightning McQueen backpack. We walked into a beautifully empty and recently cleaned bathroom. I made the unforgivable mistake of thinking, well it will only take me 30 seconds, so instead of hogging the handicapped stall, I will just hop into a little one and the kids will wait for me right outside where I can see their little feet, surely no one will come in. Suddenly with me indisposed and the bathroom filling up there were little people coming under my door and the door next to mine. Seriously, Adah crawled under my neighbors door and under the stall wall and into my space. Mortified I said, just sit still to both the gigglers sitting at my feet. Hoping we could hide in there until everyone had left and my mother of the year status would remain untarnished. NOPE, throw that prize out the window. So there I am trying to finish everything up and holding onto people to stop them from crawling under the stalls again. Adah got her fanny backed under the next stall again and Michael escaped. I caught screaming Adah who remained in my grip, until I was all buttoned and zipped. After washing my hands and explaining why we had to leave the store RIGHT NOW!! I was able to leave the Target bathroom with two blessed howling children. No I didn't beat them, but leaving Target without actually entering the store is evidently an equivalent to my sweet angels. We were in the store less than 2 minutes, but it was quite a trip.
NO TREAT FOR YOU!!!! (Read that like the Soup Nazi would say it - if you have no idea who that is, it is sad that you have missed so much Seinfeld - I will pray that you will develop a sense of humor)
If you were in the Target bathroom with me today, I really apologize for the intrusion into your privacy and forcing you to listen to me disciplining my kids. "It is not okay to crawl under the stall or the door. . . " There was big talk about choices and consequences. But inside it was just me going - HOLY CRAP, I hope I don't see anyone who was in this bathroom and the best way to do that is to LEAVE. Sad, crying children in tow - I'm sure that didn't make a scene at all.
So tonight as I tuck in my bundles of joy, we will be having talks about bathroom etiquette. Hopefully the next time we will make it past the dollar spot. Maybe I will just hold it.
Love being a mom :) it keeps you humble.
This story reminds me of something I read last week "You can either laugh or cry, but either way you have to clean up the mess. Laughter somehow makes it easier." Don't you love that?
The fatal flaw in my day was daring to pee.
Yes, that evidently turns children into non-obeying, personal space crashing, annoying little rug rats that get everyone talking.
I told them on the way in, a quick stop in the bathroom for me and then into the fun double cart for some bargain hunting and maybe even checking for a Lightning McQueen backpack. We walked into a beautifully empty and recently cleaned bathroom. I made the unforgivable mistake of thinking, well it will only take me 30 seconds, so instead of hogging the handicapped stall, I will just hop into a little one and the kids will wait for me right outside where I can see their little feet, surely no one will come in. Suddenly with me indisposed and the bathroom filling up there were little people coming under my door and the door next to mine. Seriously, Adah crawled under my neighbors door and under the stall wall and into my space. Mortified I said, just sit still to both the gigglers sitting at my feet. Hoping we could hide in there until everyone had left and my mother of the year status would remain untarnished. NOPE, throw that prize out the window. So there I am trying to finish everything up and holding onto people to stop them from crawling under the stalls again. Adah got her fanny backed under the next stall again and Michael escaped. I caught screaming Adah who remained in my grip, until I was all buttoned and zipped. After washing my hands and explaining why we had to leave the store RIGHT NOW!! I was able to leave the Target bathroom with two blessed howling children. No I didn't beat them, but leaving Target without actually entering the store is evidently an equivalent to my sweet angels. We were in the store less than 2 minutes, but it was quite a trip.
NO TREAT FOR YOU!!!! (Read that like the Soup Nazi would say it - if you have no idea who that is, it is sad that you have missed so much Seinfeld - I will pray that you will develop a sense of humor)
If you were in the Target bathroom with me today, I really apologize for the intrusion into your privacy and forcing you to listen to me disciplining my kids. "It is not okay to crawl under the stall or the door. . . " There was big talk about choices and consequences. But inside it was just me going - HOLY CRAP, I hope I don't see anyone who was in this bathroom and the best way to do that is to LEAVE. Sad, crying children in tow - I'm sure that didn't make a scene at all.
So tonight as I tuck in my bundles of joy, we will be having talks about bathroom etiquette. Hopefully the next time we will make it past the dollar spot. Maybe I will just hold it.
Love being a mom :) it keeps you humble.
This story reminds me of something I read last week "You can either laugh or cry, but either way you have to clean up the mess. Laughter somehow makes it easier." Don't you love that?
Monday, June 14, 2010
Adah is 2
June 14 2010, my Adah turned 2 today. Oh, how quickly the last 2 years have passed.
The day that she was born, was quite a day. I was induced in the morning, I think it was around 8 am and I laid in the bed waiting for the arrival of this little person who had been making my butt ache for months and watching the news. (Seriously, I had a sore butt for most of my pregnancy - no reason they could give me - I did jokingly say that the pain in my butt was a sign the baby was a girl. But, I promised myself and Curtis that I would never be a mom to call my child a pain in the butt since before their birth - no one wants to have that running through their head for life - Good grief, you can't please that woman, I was a huge problem for her before I was even born . . . - so far I have not said that to Adah.)
It was the flood of 2008. Living in Mediapolis and having friends living in the bottoms who had evacuated their homes earlier in the week, it was a waiting game. Would the levy hold? How bad would it be if it didn't? All kinds of questions were in my mind. I hadn't been able to help anyone that week, at all, being overdue with a 3 year old. I needed to stay home. As things got serious in my delivery, the levy had not yet broken. But within a half an hour after I was blessed with a girl, (I was probably still saying, it's a girl, it is really a girl) the nurse came in and told me that the levy in Oakville had just broken. Isn't that the way life works? One family is blessed beyond measure and another is devastated at the same time.
We named her Adah, which means beautiful addition. She has lived up to that name, daily, for the past 2 years. Isn't it amazing what God does to your heart when you give it away? Suddenly that person that you never laid eyes upon, is someone you couldn't imagine living without and you pray that you will never have to learn how. This has happened to me with Curtis, then Michael, and finally with Adah. A miracle of love when a family is created.
Now, watching Adah grow into a 2 year old. Things change daily. She doesn't take her brother's stuff. Adah will let you know when she is not happy. She is really developing a will, which is great. I want a child with an opinion, but shaping how she chooses to share her wishes is the challenge. I hope I figure out how she needs to be led, directed, parented, . . . not controlled. She is really starting to talk a lot, and I think more people are beginning to understand the words she is speaking. Last week she stopped calling her brother "brother" and started calling him "Michael" actually it sounds more like Bucco, which I think is hysterical. Is there anything better than a little, bitty 2 year old hollering "Come here Bucco"? I don't think so. She loves chocolate. She chose to eat pizza tonight for her birthday dinner and when given a choice wanted to go to "azio" Mazzios. She rarely snuggles, but when she does, she tells you that it is time. She can tell me when her glasses are dirty or crooked and wants them fixed, now. She will only kiss you on the lips and if you offer her your cheek, she will chase your lips until you give in or there are no kisses.
There are so many little funny things about this beautiful addition this is just the tip of a long list. I know that you have a person in your life, with all the little things that make them too adorable for words. I don't want to be one of those mothers who thinks that my kids are the cutest, sweetest, most interesting, and smartest in the world, they just are those things to me. If you ask I will tell you that I am incredibly biased. :) I am also blessed to be able to learn all these things and watch my children go from 1 to 2 or 5 to 6. I just pray that I will always find them fun and interesting.
The day that she was born, was quite a day. I was induced in the morning, I think it was around 8 am and I laid in the bed waiting for the arrival of this little person who had been making my butt ache for months and watching the news. (Seriously, I had a sore butt for most of my pregnancy - no reason they could give me - I did jokingly say that the pain in my butt was a sign the baby was a girl. But, I promised myself and Curtis that I would never be a mom to call my child a pain in the butt since before their birth - no one wants to have that running through their head for life - Good grief, you can't please that woman, I was a huge problem for her before I was even born . . . - so far I have not said that to Adah.)
It was the flood of 2008. Living in Mediapolis and having friends living in the bottoms who had evacuated their homes earlier in the week, it was a waiting game. Would the levy hold? How bad would it be if it didn't? All kinds of questions were in my mind. I hadn't been able to help anyone that week, at all, being overdue with a 3 year old. I needed to stay home. As things got serious in my delivery, the levy had not yet broken. But within a half an hour after I was blessed with a girl, (I was probably still saying, it's a girl, it is really a girl) the nurse came in and told me that the levy in Oakville had just broken. Isn't that the way life works? One family is blessed beyond measure and another is devastated at the same time.
We named her Adah, which means beautiful addition. She has lived up to that name, daily, for the past 2 years. Isn't it amazing what God does to your heart when you give it away? Suddenly that person that you never laid eyes upon, is someone you couldn't imagine living without and you pray that you will never have to learn how. This has happened to me with Curtis, then Michael, and finally with Adah. A miracle of love when a family is created.
Now, watching Adah grow into a 2 year old. Things change daily. She doesn't take her brother's stuff. Adah will let you know when she is not happy. She is really developing a will, which is great. I want a child with an opinion, but shaping how she chooses to share her wishes is the challenge. I hope I figure out how she needs to be led, directed, parented, . . . not controlled. She is really starting to talk a lot, and I think more people are beginning to understand the words she is speaking. Last week she stopped calling her brother "brother" and started calling him "Michael" actually it sounds more like Bucco, which I think is hysterical. Is there anything better than a little, bitty 2 year old hollering "Come here Bucco"? I don't think so. She loves chocolate. She chose to eat pizza tonight for her birthday dinner and when given a choice wanted to go to "azio" Mazzios. She rarely snuggles, but when she does, she tells you that it is time. She can tell me when her glasses are dirty or crooked and wants them fixed, now. She will only kiss you on the lips and if you offer her your cheek, she will chase your lips until you give in or there are no kisses. 
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Humbling
Sometimes children give us the best dose of humility and reality, better than Dr. Phil. (I reference that man a lot, but don't know that I have watched a show of his - um - ever or not since he left the warm embrace of Oprah's show.)
Yesterday at lunch we were talking with Michael about being left handed. Here is the conversation:
Curtis - You know Michael, if you love baseball and could pitch an 80 mph fast ball, you could play for the big leagues.
Michael - Like on TV?
Curtis - Yeah. And you would make a lot of money too. Then you could say thanks to your mom and dad by buying us cool stuff. Like a big house, and I want a Dodge Charger (maybe I have the wrong car, but it was in the Dodge family and started with a C) and you know that your mom wants a Jaguar.
Me - It doesn't have to be new, just a convertible
Curtis - What do you think, wouldn't that be great.
Michael - I'm not doing that.
Curtis - Really why?
Michael - You don't need that stuff. I'll give my money to kids who need it. Isn't that what we are supposed to do when we have extra?
Curtis - You're right, that would be better.
Love that boy. Today he brought me a cap from I think a Spray N Wash bottle, filled with change he collected, and told me that we need to get to Wal-Mart and give it to those kids who need it, because there were a couple hundred dollars there and that could make kids like Shaelynn feel a lot better and not have to go to heaven before the grow up. Now, you need to know that I don't have a couple hundred dollars in change around here, but if I did have some extra I would be taking it to Wal-Mart to donate in the Children's Miracle Network collector, to match the generous spirit of my son.
Why am I so selfish? Seriously, a convertible Jag. I would love that, but he is right there are kids out there who need help. I guess I will be rolling in my Sienna for a while and praying that my son remains generous and continues to show me when I'm not.
Thank God for matching us with the children who teach us to be better people. I love being a mom :) Back to matching socks.
Yesterday at lunch we were talking with Michael about being left handed. Here is the conversation:
Curtis - You know Michael, if you love baseball and could pitch an 80 mph fast ball, you could play for the big leagues.
Michael - Like on TV?
Curtis - Yeah. And you would make a lot of money too. Then you could say thanks to your mom and dad by buying us cool stuff. Like a big house, and I want a Dodge Charger (maybe I have the wrong car, but it was in the Dodge family and started with a C) and you know that your mom wants a Jaguar.
Me - It doesn't have to be new, just a convertible
Curtis - What do you think, wouldn't that be great.
Michael - I'm not doing that.
Curtis - Really why?
Michael - You don't need that stuff. I'll give my money to kids who need it. Isn't that what we are supposed to do when we have extra?
Curtis - You're right, that would be better.
Love that boy. Today he brought me a cap from I think a Spray N Wash bottle, filled with change he collected, and told me that we need to get to Wal-Mart and give it to those kids who need it, because there were a couple hundred dollars there and that could make kids like Shaelynn feel a lot better and not have to go to heaven before the grow up. Now, you need to know that I don't have a couple hundred dollars in change around here, but if I did have some extra I would be taking it to Wal-Mart to donate in the Children's Miracle Network collector, to match the generous spirit of my son.
Why am I so selfish? Seriously, a convertible Jag. I would love that, but he is right there are kids out there who need help. I guess I will be rolling in my Sienna for a while and praying that my son remains generous and continues to show me when I'm not.
Thank God for matching us with the children who teach us to be better people. I love being a mom :) Back to matching socks.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
What a week . . .
Wow, it was a beautiful wedding. I loved it.
From watching Tim and Joy do cookies in the yard in Dad's Mustang all the way to them driving away, it was a blessed evening. It was one of those "Can you feel the love tonight" (are you singing) moments.
I will give you some of my highlights: watching all the children come down the aisle - let's see 12 total, Joy's 11 nieces and nephews and Grant's 1,
Grant pledging to love Joy with his WHOLE body later that night (yes that was in his vows), 
the butterfly release in honor of Shaelynn Sue the heavenly flower girl, the frequent train whistle prompting kisses from the bride and groom, the kids peanut butter buffet, the sparkler dance to "Put Your Head on My Shoulder", the flowers - have I mentioned the flowers absolutely gorgeous, and so many other moments. What a lovely evening. What a blessing to be a part of this couple, this family, and everything that surrounded the wedding and marriage. Boy, those shoes - I picked out some duds, my feet may never be the same. By the time the wedding was over and it was time to walk back up the aisle I had to tell Sarah to slow down, I couldn't feel my feet and knew I was going to topple any moment. I think that was the only bummer of the whole day, and really that was just me, I'm sure everyone else's feet were fine. Everyone knew that Joy and Grant loved each other and were truly giddy at the thought of marriage and being linked for life. Someone even told me that it was a rare wedding, they left knowing that this couple would make it, without a doubt. Don't you love how when God is in it, everyone knows it is right. Not that it is smooth sailing, but when you start solid you have a good place to build from. 
But boy was I tired. Life doesn't slow down for you just because you are tired though.
I had my wisdom teeth taken out last Thursday, which hasn't been too bad. Nothing like I feared. When I went for my consultation with the oral surgeon they made me watch a video, which the theme of went something like this . . . TAKE YOUR WISDOM TEETH ABOUT BEFORE YOU ARE 25 OR ELSE TERRIBLE THINGS WILL HAPPEN TO YOUR MOUTH. bwah, hahaha. Now, I know that most of you are shocked to know that in fact I am 25 and have been for more than a year or two. So, I questioned why they made me watch the video and prepared for the day with some trepidation (wow - that is a good word here, every once in a while I do use that education). I am sore and glad for some those 800 mg ibuprofen, but am doing okay. I have a great husband who is patient and helpful. My mom also took the kids the whole day on Thursday and then my sweet friend Natalie had them all day Friday. Don't know how people make it in life without some extra hands to back them up.
So tomorrow will be Curtis and I's 8th year anniversary. Does that make it our STAR anniversary - 8 years on the 8th? Can you believe it? I have been blessed to be legally and spiritually bound to this man for the last 8 years. Wow, time has really flown. I can honestly say that I love him more today than I did in 2002. I find him funny and charming, and cute. He is an awesome dad and a great husband. God did direct the path that put us together, there isn't anyone on Earth better for me than Curtis. Ask around, there are people who will tell you. Oh, yes, Curtis and Bek - no one else could put up with her. He is a saint :) Love that man. I am so blessed that he chose me.
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Wednesday, May 26, 2010
What a week . . . Joy
Well, here it is . . . the week Joy gets married.
You know it is still strange. Isn't your little sister supposed to stay "little"? It wasn't this weird to see any of my other siblings get married, but Baby Joy, now that is just weird.
To me it is that thing that you knew would happen one day, but are surprised when that day actually gets here. Well, for me that day is nearly here. And then suddenly, there she is, a bride, a wife, a grown up. I don't know if she will ever be a "grown up" in my mind. She will be 87 and have 43 great grand children and I will still be think of her Baby Joy and say things like, now you have plenty of time don't rush it, and telling all her babies stories of her youth. HELLO if Joy is 87 I will be, uuuuhhh a few months older than that :)
I am so glad to be able to be a part of this new beginning with her. What a blessing it is to have a sister that is _____ years younger than me and have her be one of my very best friends, definitely in my top 10 favorite people in the world. It has been fun to watch everything come together for her wedding, but more fun to watch her begin to build a marriage. Which is so much more important than a great party, don't get me wrong, I will be dancing and eating cake, but I want to do it again in 50 years to celebrate their golden anniversary.
Once in a young lifetime one should be allowed to have as much sweetness as one can possibly want and hold. ~ Judith Olney
Marriage advice, from a virtual beginner in marriage - only nearly 8 years, but 8 great years. (Love my sweet Curty.)
1) Realize that the thing that you love about him will become the thing that drives you CRAZY. Just try to remember that you chose this and find the good about it. Go back to that moment when you first got together and you thought it was the greatest thing and smile and laugh and find ways to admire that "thing" whatever it is, again.
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. ~ Germaine Greer
2) Learn to laugh. There will be times when it is hard to find the fun, but you need to search it out. A home filled with laughter is easier to live in. Sharing memories, stories, movies, books, music, . . . are great ways to share laughter. Laugh at yourself, when the smoke alarm goes off say "dinner's ready".
Let all thy joys be as the month of May, and all thy days be as a marriage day. ~Francis Quarles
3) Share your warning signs. We all have signs that things are about to get "serious". Make sure that Grant knows your tells. Otherwise he is just sitting there watching ESPN and you are banging around in the kitchen and suddenly out of nowhere you begin talking to yourself and there it is meltdown, he asks what you're having for dinner and WHAMO - he didn't even know there was a line and there he is dancing on the other side of it. Not that I would know this is helpful hint by personal experience, I must have read it in a book or something.
To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up. ~ Ogden Nash
4) Brag on him. Nothing will get him more on your side than when he feels like you are with him and for him, all the time and completely. Not to mention the side benefit of saying it out loud helps you to really know and believe it to be true. So when you are tempted to go negative, not that you will be, but if you are you will remember all the truth you have shared with others about him, his character, his goals, his clothes and you will know it was all exactly on the money about him and just what you need to remember to turn the other way on Downer Drive.
Come, let's be a comfortable couple and take care of each other! How glad we shall be, that we have somebody we are fond of always, to talk to and sit with. ~Charles Dickens
5) It seems like there should be 5 things, I didn't mean to go to 5, but if you have a 4 part thing you need the 5th just to make it feel finished. Maybe that is just me. So for the 5th I will go a bit more spiritual. Know God and know Grant. You have to do both, or you will be missing out on the greatest part of marriage. I know that it is weird, because a lot of people will tell you it is the S*#, that is up at the top of the list, but not in the top spot. If you know God and are always growing in that relationship, He will pull you closer to Grant. And if you know Grant and are always growing to know him better, since you picked a godly husband, he will be pulling you closer to God. That kind of intimacy and vulnerability will make the S*# better - bonus.
Grow old with me! The best is yet to be. ~Robert Browning
I love you Baby Joy and I am glad you picked Grant. I am blessed to be a part of your wedding and will be a huge fan of your marriage. I can't wait to see where God will take you and what your life together will bring. Is is still a bit weird that you are getting married, but now it would be weird if you didn't. So in case you were unsure I am proud of you and so glad that God made us sisters.
I didn't start this as a heart felt letter to Joy, it just turned into that. I just went back and added the marriage quotes, I love those kind of things. Hope that is okay with the 2 people that read this. :)
You know it is still strange. Isn't your little sister supposed to stay "little"? It wasn't this weird to see any of my other siblings get married, but Baby Joy, now that is just weird.
To me it is that thing that you knew would happen one day, but are surprised when that day actually gets here. Well, for me that day is nearly here. And then suddenly, there she is, a bride, a wife, a grown up. I don't know if she will ever be a "grown up" in my mind. She will be 87 and have 43 great grand children and I will still be think of her Baby Joy and say things like, now you have plenty of time don't rush it, and telling all her babies stories of her youth. HELLO if Joy is 87 I will be, uuuuhhh a few months older than that :)
I am so glad to be able to be a part of this new beginning with her. What a blessing it is to have a sister that is _____ years younger than me and have her be one of my very best friends, definitely in my top 10 favorite people in the world. It has been fun to watch everything come together for her wedding, but more fun to watch her begin to build a marriage. Which is so much more important than a great party, don't get me wrong, I will be dancing and eating cake, but I want to do it again in 50 years to celebrate their golden anniversary.
Once in a young lifetime one should be allowed to have as much sweetness as one can possibly want and hold. ~ Judith Olney
Marriage advice, from a virtual beginner in marriage - only nearly 8 years, but 8 great years. (Love my sweet Curty.)
1) Realize that the thing that you love about him will become the thing that drives you CRAZY. Just try to remember that you chose this and find the good about it. Go back to that moment when you first got together and you thought it was the greatest thing and smile and laugh and find ways to admire that "thing" whatever it is, again.
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. ~ Germaine Greer
2) Learn to laugh. There will be times when it is hard to find the fun, but you need to search it out. A home filled with laughter is easier to live in. Sharing memories, stories, movies, books, music, . . . are great ways to share laughter. Laugh at yourself, when the smoke alarm goes off say "dinner's ready".
Let all thy joys be as the month of May, and all thy days be as a marriage day. ~Francis Quarles
3) Share your warning signs. We all have signs that things are about to get "serious". Make sure that Grant knows your tells. Otherwise he is just sitting there watching ESPN and you are banging around in the kitchen and suddenly out of nowhere you begin talking to yourself and there it is meltdown, he asks what you're having for dinner and WHAMO - he didn't even know there was a line and there he is dancing on the other side of it. Not that I would know this is helpful hint by personal experience, I must have read it in a book or something.
To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up. ~ Ogden Nash
4) Brag on him. Nothing will get him more on your side than when he feels like you are with him and for him, all the time and completely. Not to mention the side benefit of saying it out loud helps you to really know and believe it to be true. So when you are tempted to go negative, not that you will be, but if you are you will remember all the truth you have shared with others about him, his character, his goals, his clothes and you will know it was all exactly on the money about him and just what you need to remember to turn the other way on Downer Drive.
Come, let's be a comfortable couple and take care of each other! How glad we shall be, that we have somebody we are fond of always, to talk to and sit with. ~Charles Dickens
5) It seems like there should be 5 things, I didn't mean to go to 5, but if you have a 4 part thing you need the 5th just to make it feel finished. Maybe that is just me. So for the 5th I will go a bit more spiritual. Know God and know Grant. You have to do both, or you will be missing out on the greatest part of marriage. I know that it is weird, because a lot of people will tell you it is the S*#, that is up at the top of the list, but not in the top spot. If you know God and are always growing in that relationship, He will pull you closer to Grant. And if you know Grant and are always growing to know him better, since you picked a godly husband, he will be pulling you closer to God. That kind of intimacy and vulnerability will make the S*# better - bonus.
Grow old with me! The best is yet to be. ~Robert Browning
I love you Baby Joy and I am glad you picked Grant. I am blessed to be a part of your wedding and will be a huge fan of your marriage. I can't wait to see where God will take you and what your life together will bring. Is is still a bit weird that you are getting married, but now it would be weird if you didn't. So in case you were unsure I am proud of you and so glad that God made us sisters.
I didn't start this as a heart felt letter to Joy, it just turned into that. I just went back and added the marriage quotes, I love those kind of things. Hope that is okay with the 2 people that read this. :)
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